Entry tags:
Dear Beast:
If I am still breathing, I am not a food source.
No, not even the edges of my ears.
Despite your delusions of being a stole, you are not a garotte, and it's unlikely you could make me into a food source by lying across my neck.
Do you have a head cold? The back-beat on your purr's all raspy.
It's remarkably difficult to hear anything else if you're lying on my exposed ear and Purring.
Crawling under the covers with me is not an option, even if you are cute and fluffy. You bite in interesting locations. (should we have named you Stitch, instead of after a werewolf and a fledgling drakthos?)
If you stick your paw in my eye, expect to be evicted. If you bite my nose, expect to be evicted. If you attempt to eat my hair, expect to be evicted.
Dive-bombing my abdomen from the windowsill is not appreciated, o fluffy one.
With utmost sincerity,
the not!food-source.
No, not even the edges of my ears.
Despite your delusions of being a stole, you are not a garotte, and it's unlikely you could make me into a food source by lying across my neck.
Do you have a head cold? The back-beat on your purr's all raspy.
It's remarkably difficult to hear anything else if you're lying on my exposed ear and Purring.
Crawling under the covers with me is not an option, even if you are cute and fluffy. You bite in interesting locations. (should we have named you Stitch, instead of after a werewolf and a fledgling drakthos?)
If you stick your paw in my eye, expect to be evicted. If you bite my nose, expect to be evicted. If you attempt to eat my hair, expect to be evicted.
Dive-bombing my abdomen from the windowsill is not appreciated, o fluffy one.
With utmost sincerity,
the not!food-source.