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Lizard brain: Chill. (Some tricks and suggestions)
Hokay, so. (Here is the Earth . . )
Due to some health insurance weirdness I can't resolve until I get some paperwork*, it would cost me around $200 a visit to go and see the ex-pat Aussie when I'm in the states.
*: boring story that boils down to I can't talk to the health insurance company about changing plans until I can file my taxes.
This is outside my spending comfort zone, especially considering that last year's plan let me see her for $30 a visit and I kind of imprinted.
So I was peering around for someone else who might be able to tackle a similar or entirely new angle on the not-quite-war me and mymeatsuit body are locked in, and my Favourite Pilates Teacher suggested that the owner of the studio might have some ideas.
The studio owner has a master's degree in human movement & performance, recently did a second degree in acupuncture, and has a habit of geeking out about subtle human body tricks where I can hear her, so I thought why not and booked a half hour with her for Monday afternoon.
I was expecting a rather needly appointment. Instead we wound up talking about the limbic system* and how breathing pattern/depth/speed and eye movement/blink rate can tell an observer how someone's doing.
*: I know this term is getting outdated, so if anyone has an update, please let me know!
This is going to be somewhat babbly and nonlinear, since I can't find a good internet source to paraphrase from, and may be wrong in the particular tiny-level details of why this works because I wasn't taking notes Monday. That said, I did a pilates session before I saw her Monday, and a second session yesterday afternoon, and my body shifted between 'em.
By staring, breathing, and humming.
I wish I was kidding. I'm not: instead of pulling on my diaphragm and my pelvic floor to do ab work, I got a broader sense of less-ouchy work through more of my belly, and I could use my iliopsoas muscles like they weren't welded to my inner curves of hipbone. o.O
So, limbic calming. It's a thing.
--
I wouldn't normally describe myself as anxious*, but there's autism-spectrum Brainquirks in the family, and I had a gross-trauma pelvic injury before I was ten**. It's not a shock that my body's hanging on to some tension I don't pay attention to because it's been there forever.
*: Supplicating bureaucracies being the most notable exception (there is no faster way to make me twitch than muttering 'grad school' at my brain).
**: If you don't already know, you probably don't want to. Great way to make new medical professionals wince, though.
I tend to close my eyes when I'm concentrating, especially if I'm thinking my way through a physical series of motions or gestures. Apparently this is a bit of a hard-brake to the limbic system: I'm deliberately eliminating a way of scanning for danger*. I'm rerouting unconscious 'where's the attack coming from' circuits into conscious 'okay, body moves like so, feeling these muscles activate . . ' circuits.
This isn't ideal, obviously, because I'm spending energy on the rerouting process.
*: the other two big ones for humans are hearing and smell, which is why listening to familiar music or opening a specific perfume/scent bottle can be really, really soothing: you're telling your lizardy bits 'We're safe. See how things we have positive associations with are around us?'
I also habitually breathe in more air than I expel, and while I've largely moved away from the shallow front-of-chest breathing pattern I maintained for years due to stuck ribs*, I still flip into breathing in and out through my mouth when I'm exerting myself.
*: funny how you stop taking a deep breath when you get a stabbing sensation from one of your shoulders into one of your lungs if you do.
Breathing through the nose slows the flow of air into your lungs, and a long, full exhalation encourages vasodilation and the intake of more oxygen into your bloodstream. Having enough air tends to help calm our inner lizards, and quick, shallow breaths tend to key our inner lizards up: 'do we need to run away? i guess we can run away? where do we need to run? what are we running from?'
So that whole 'deep, calming breaths' admonition is actually useful, if frequently condescending as hell (and of course the right kind of breathing is quirkier than people think).
So is colour theory: that whole thing where if you're looking at colours that make you feel happy, you will feel happier.
For those of us who aren't sure what 'happy' looks like when it's at home, finding colours or visual textures that we want to keep looking at (as opposed to having to make ourselves look back to, because we want to look anywhere else*) is an easier approach. Especially if we notice our blinking** and breathing rates slowing as a result of looking at a particular colour or texture.
*: Or possibly everywhere else. If your eyes are flicking around like a hockey goalie in a post-game interview who's still in 'where's the puck coming from?' mode, it's a bit of an indicator that your inner lizard is concerned about getting eaten. Or a puck to the head. =P
**: Occasional easy-feeling flicks are different from ratta-tat-ratta-tat can't-look-at-anything-very-long, just like big slow breaths are different from quick open-mouthed pants.
You don't necessarily want a colour that grabs and holds your attention as a Focus Colour; for example, I will always look at* particular shade groups of emerald green and cool grey, but both groups are active colours, not 'I want to stare at you and purr' colours. A lot of people will sit up and pay attention to Reds, but you want a colour that winds you down**, not one that winds you up for this purpose.
*: 'look at', 'stare possessively at', functionally equivalent, yes/yes?
**: 'Why do they always paint hallways that colour?' 'They say taupe is very soothing.' /obligatory Ocean's Eleven reference
The third component of the limbic calming system I was introduced to on Monday is humming. When you're keyed up, it's much harder to hum in a way that feels like it's resonating in your chest. So humming can be a way of testing how you're feeling, whether or not you're consciously aware of Being Tense: if your hum is thin and high, and you can't think your way into dropping it down into your chest, it might be worth taking a few minutes and playing Inner Lizard: Chill.
The version I got sent home with as homework is:
1. Find a a comfy spot to sit, lie, or theoretically stand in, then a focus point/colour. I'm either sitting in traffic or flopped onto my back on the couch, and do better aiming at a dot or texture-point in a bigger colour, instead of trying to look at a big block consistently.
2. While looking at your focus point, start breathing: in and out through your nose, 3-count inhale, 5-count exhale.
- Tongue towards/against the roof of your mouth, but not against the back of your teeth; keep your jaw soft and space between the biting surfaces of your teeth, lips gently together.
- Try to completely empty your lungs on the exhale. (I have to do a 7 or 9 count exhale every so often to manage this)
- Notice how often you're blinking, and how comfortably.
- Try for five minutes of breathing like this, at least once a day to begin with.
3. Once you're breathing easily while looking at your focus point, start humming on your exhale. Your counting's going to go out the window, this is okay. You're thinking about the quality of your hum, not the length of inhale-exhale at this point.
- The more of you that feels the resonance, the better.
- Aim for 10 hums, or if you can feel the quality of hum changing as you progress through, keep going until you get bored or the cat comes to figure out what the hell you're up to.
3.5. This may be me specific, with the chronically-tense pelvic floor and accompanying abdominal Weird muscle patterning, but gently manipulate your hyoid bone (it's at the upper end of your larynx-thyroid-adam's-apple complex in the front of your throat) from side to side and up and down while humming on the exhale to encourage smooth, consistent motion.
- It's easier to move up and down by changing the pitch of humming than pushing with your fingers--and all you're going for is motion without sticky/stuck points. Be gentle with your throat.
--
Related reading: A Dr Stephen Porges interview on his polyvagal theory and methods on using other humans to calm an Inner Lizard/trying to help calm someone's Inner Lizard.
a babbly post I made after reading the Porges interview talking about acoustic therapy protocols for anxiety, and noting a new term for the 'I'm driving a meatsuit with bad controls' problem: 'sensory processing dysfunction'.
-
Questions, corrections, links, and New People are welcomed to this post. So yes, if you want to link people here, that's cool. :)
Due to some health insurance weirdness I can't resolve until I get some paperwork*, it would cost me around $200 a visit to go and see the ex-pat Aussie when I'm in the states.
*: boring story that boils down to I can't talk to the health insurance company about changing plans until I can file my taxes.
This is outside my spending comfort zone, especially considering that last year's plan let me see her for $30 a visit and I kind of imprinted.
So I was peering around for someone else who might be able to tackle a similar or entirely new angle on the not-quite-war me and my
The studio owner has a master's degree in human movement & performance, recently did a second degree in acupuncture, and has a habit of geeking out about subtle human body tricks where I can hear her, so I thought why not and booked a half hour with her for Monday afternoon.
I was expecting a rather needly appointment. Instead we wound up talking about the limbic system* and how breathing pattern/depth/speed and eye movement/blink rate can tell an observer how someone's doing.
*: I know this term is getting outdated, so if anyone has an update, please let me know!
This is going to be somewhat babbly and nonlinear, since I can't find a good internet source to paraphrase from, and may be wrong in the particular tiny-level details of why this works because I wasn't taking notes Monday. That said, I did a pilates session before I saw her Monday, and a second session yesterday afternoon, and my body shifted between 'em.
By staring, breathing, and humming.
I wish I was kidding. I'm not: instead of pulling on my diaphragm and my pelvic floor to do ab work, I got a broader sense of less-ouchy work through more of my belly, and I could use my iliopsoas muscles like they weren't welded to my inner curves of hipbone. o.O
So, limbic calming. It's a thing.
--
I wouldn't normally describe myself as anxious*, but there's autism-spectrum Brainquirks in the family, and I had a gross-trauma pelvic injury before I was ten**. It's not a shock that my body's hanging on to some tension I don't pay attention to because it's been there forever.
*: Supplicating bureaucracies being the most notable exception (there is no faster way to make me twitch than muttering 'grad school' at my brain).
**: If you don't already know, you probably don't want to. Great way to make new medical professionals wince, though.
I tend to close my eyes when I'm concentrating, especially if I'm thinking my way through a physical series of motions or gestures. Apparently this is a bit of a hard-brake to the limbic system: I'm deliberately eliminating a way of scanning for danger*. I'm rerouting unconscious 'where's the attack coming from' circuits into conscious 'okay, body moves like so, feeling these muscles activate . . ' circuits.
This isn't ideal, obviously, because I'm spending energy on the rerouting process.
*: the other two big ones for humans are hearing and smell, which is why listening to familiar music or opening a specific perfume/scent bottle can be really, really soothing: you're telling your lizardy bits 'We're safe. See how things we have positive associations with are around us?'
I also habitually breathe in more air than I expel, and while I've largely moved away from the shallow front-of-chest breathing pattern I maintained for years due to stuck ribs*, I still flip into breathing in and out through my mouth when I'm exerting myself.
*: funny how you stop taking a deep breath when you get a stabbing sensation from one of your shoulders into one of your lungs if you do.
Breathing through the nose slows the flow of air into your lungs, and a long, full exhalation encourages vasodilation and the intake of more oxygen into your bloodstream. Having enough air tends to help calm our inner lizards, and quick, shallow breaths tend to key our inner lizards up: 'do we need to run away? i guess we can run away? where do we need to run? what are we running from?'
So that whole 'deep, calming breaths' admonition is actually useful, if frequently condescending as hell (and of course the right kind of breathing is quirkier than people think).
So is colour theory: that whole thing where if you're looking at colours that make you feel happy, you will feel happier.
For those of us who aren't sure what 'happy' looks like when it's at home, finding colours or visual textures that we want to keep looking at (as opposed to having to make ourselves look back to, because we want to look anywhere else*) is an easier approach. Especially if we notice our blinking** and breathing rates slowing as a result of looking at a particular colour or texture.
*: Or possibly everywhere else. If your eyes are flicking around like a hockey goalie in a post-game interview who's still in 'where's the puck coming from?' mode, it's a bit of an indicator that your inner lizard is concerned about getting eaten. Or a puck to the head. =P
**: Occasional easy-feeling flicks are different from ratta-tat-ratta-tat can't-look-at-anything-very-long, just like big slow breaths are different from quick open-mouthed pants.
You don't necessarily want a colour that grabs and holds your attention as a Focus Colour; for example, I will always look at* particular shade groups of emerald green and cool grey, but both groups are active colours, not 'I want to stare at you and purr' colours. A lot of people will sit up and pay attention to Reds, but you want a colour that winds you down**, not one that winds you up for this purpose.
*: 'look at', 'stare possessively at', functionally equivalent, yes/yes?
**: 'Why do they always paint hallways that colour?' 'They say taupe is very soothing.' /obligatory Ocean's Eleven reference
The third component of the limbic calming system I was introduced to on Monday is humming. When you're keyed up, it's much harder to hum in a way that feels like it's resonating in your chest. So humming can be a way of testing how you're feeling, whether or not you're consciously aware of Being Tense: if your hum is thin and high, and you can't think your way into dropping it down into your chest, it might be worth taking a few minutes and playing Inner Lizard: Chill.
The version I got sent home with as homework is:
1. Find a a comfy spot to sit, lie, or theoretically stand in, then a focus point/colour. I'm either sitting in traffic or flopped onto my back on the couch, and do better aiming at a dot or texture-point in a bigger colour, instead of trying to look at a big block consistently.
2. While looking at your focus point, start breathing: in and out through your nose, 3-count inhale, 5-count exhale.
- Tongue towards/against the roof of your mouth, but not against the back of your teeth; keep your jaw soft and space between the biting surfaces of your teeth, lips gently together.
- Try to completely empty your lungs on the exhale. (I have to do a 7 or 9 count exhale every so often to manage this)
- Notice how often you're blinking, and how comfortably.
- Try for five minutes of breathing like this, at least once a day to begin with.
3. Once you're breathing easily while looking at your focus point, start humming on your exhale. Your counting's going to go out the window, this is okay. You're thinking about the quality of your hum, not the length of inhale-exhale at this point.
- The more of you that feels the resonance, the better.
- Aim for 10 hums, or if you can feel the quality of hum changing as you progress through, keep going until you get bored or the cat comes to figure out what the hell you're up to.
3.5. This may be me specific, with the chronically-tense pelvic floor and accompanying abdominal Weird muscle patterning, but gently manipulate your hyoid bone (it's at the upper end of your larynx-thyroid-adam's-apple complex in the front of your throat) from side to side and up and down while humming on the exhale to encourage smooth, consistent motion.
- It's easier to move up and down by changing the pitch of humming than pushing with your fingers--and all you're going for is motion without sticky/stuck points. Be gentle with your throat.
--
Related reading: A Dr Stephen Porges interview on his polyvagal theory and methods on using other humans to calm an Inner Lizard/trying to help calm someone's Inner Lizard.
a babbly post I made after reading the Porges interview talking about acoustic therapy protocols for anxiety, and noting a new term for the 'I'm driving a meatsuit with bad controls' problem: 'sensory processing dysfunction'.
-
Questions, corrections, links, and New People are welcomed to this post. So yes, if you want to link people here, that's cool. :)
no subject
Otherwise, this is another one of those times where I blink and am slightly startled that again, I really do appear to do with breathing on a normal basis what seems to be fine-tuned control in others. (The colour thing has never worked for me: all visual stimulus is too stimulating.)
no subject
I was thinking the humming thing might be useful information for you, if nothing else. Once you get over the cold, anyway, since right now your resonance structures will just laugh at anything you throw at them. =\ (Well. Autistic, babe. You have a slightly-broken information prioritization system as a baseline, and then have everything else piled on top of that. Blowing the visual-processing circuit is sort of par for the course.)
no subject
I'm familiar with the effect as a sideset of singing, yeah. It's also part of the effect of the classical "om". And yeah right now I sound like a frog and my breaths are very . . . careful.
no subject
I figured you might have run into it before, but sometimes a reminder is exactly what you need to apply an old fact to something new, y'know?
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(The nicest thing about it is that it can be really, really subtle in the way a lot of my other tools aren't.)
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What kind of colours do you like as focus-colours?
no subject
Hrm. I remember having tried a twig on a pale roof (mleh), moss on an aqua roof (better), corner of white ceiling (not really), corner of wooden bookshelf (works), corner of wooden door (works), cornery bits of wooden china hutch (works), the black dot on the webcam on the silver background of the Air (ehh), and one of the icons on the top edge of the menu on the Air (again, not great). I seem to need a texture spot to focus on, instead of a broader patch of colour, and want to give some rusty-red and golden tones a try. I don't like focusing on most of the colours I wear all the time, which is sort of interesting.
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I have a massive preference for colours with light behind them, like the sky, personally; those are the things I can just staaare at.
(re: breathing 3/5 and struggling to exhale enough - the tools I'm familiar with suggest a 1:2 inhale:exhale ratio, which might suit you better? Me, I struggle with 1:2 for the opposite reason; too long an exhale.)
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:) I'm finding I need a smallish target zone to look at, or I start scanning for movement around me (more in a slightly-predatory frame of mind than slightly-concerned-about-getting-et but noteworthy nonetheless).
I think I mostly just don't like exhaling fully so I try to cheat. =\ Adding a longer-count every so often seems to do it/act as a reminder about, y'know, actually exhaling, but the thought's good. :D
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